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America Politics

The War Against Men

It’s about fucking time. We’ve been degrading women, the earth, children, strangers, animals, water, the air, and more for all of human history as far as I can tell. If there was ever any measure of who should not be in charge of this planet – we, and by we – I mean men, all of us with dicks and balls no matter where we like to put them – we should not be allowed to rule. We do a terrible job of it.

Yes, we are good at some things. Some of us are nice. Some of us are considerate. Some of us aren’t bad at all. Some of us are even good – but the record speaks for itself. Men are guilty of noise pollution, bullying, creating wars, and all kinds of other things.

I for one am very happy to have women step up to the plate and relieve us of our power to rule.

A few words of advice – if I may – ignore or pay attention – it’s up to you.

1) We did it wrong. Coercion and force are not the way forward. Mass killings, mass incarceration, warfare, and vile violence are not the answer.

2) Punishing the Germans after WWI led to Hitler. Punishing men could lead to a terrible backlash…please find a way to do it that doesn’t give power to monsters.

3) Men essentially want three things 1) Praise 2) Blowjobs 3) Sandwiches – it’s the quest for these three things (which all have the most power when they come from women) that have led to all the horrors men have brought to the world. I’m throwing this in because in my experience, most women don’t understand just how powerful they really are. This is it – the secret to controlling all the men and taking all the power.

4) If you can figure out how to exterminate us, it will probably be best – but I can’t help but think that we offer something that can be wonderful – some of us make the best fathers – of course others are only good if they are gone. So, either way, I understand.

5) Focus on those who nurture cooperation and working together – I mean when you are giving power to leaders…because there are some women who are essentially chasing the same motivations as men and those women will only bring you more of the same.

6) This is the big failing of men in leadership – we seem to have always been focused on fixing the external world while the world around us was imperfect and suffering. Start with the woman next to you and make sure she is taken care of before you start looking across the world. A community of autonomous and healthy people where no one is left out – that’s a community that can grow and help others.

But, I’m just another man offering a little bit of perspective from where we were coming from – offer me some praise and you own my soul. Offer me a sandwich and you own my body. Offer me a blowjob and you own my ability to make decisions. I know that isn’t the revolution you have in mind, but it would work.