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chris damitio

A Huge Relief – I’m not that smart!

I’ve recently realized that I’m not nearly as smart as I thought I was – it’s a huge relief. It’s been a huge burden to have thought I was such a genius but find myself in situations that no truly gifted person would ever be near. Whether it is dealing with being poor, struggling to support my family, making bad decisions in general, or specific stupid situations – there has always been a nagging voice in the back of my mind shaming me and wondering how a genius such as I could possibly be in whatever situation I might find myself. The answer, as it turns out, is simple. I’m not a genius. I’m rarely the smartest person in the room (unless I’m in a room with some real dunces). I may not even be of average intelligence. You might think I would be sad to realize this – but I’m not. It’s awesome. It explains so much. For most of my life I’ve been walking around thinking I was a super-genius and wondering why the world was so unfair as to give everyone else around me the rewards that come from doing what needs to be done when I was obviously the one who deserved the rewards more. I thought it might be because I was short, but then I’d see shorter people doing better than me. I thought it was because I was balding – but I see balder people doing better than me. I thought it was because of this or that or something else – but always there were people that were more this, that or something else than me achieving more than me. The one thing I never doubted was my own brilliance. I never questioned that I was so much smarter than everyone else. I was so smart I didn’t need to listen. I was so gifted that I didn’t need to study. I was so talented in the brains department that I could get away with what the less cerebral could not. Boy was I smart. Except I wasn’t. Now it all makes sense. All of that gifted and talented stuff in the 1970s and 1980s made a monster out of me. I may have been a smart child but I sure turned into a dumb adult! Thank God I’m lucky! Now, maybe I can turn things around since I’ve figured this out. I’m so happy I figured out that I’m dumb!

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