Art and Beauty scary clowns The Life Aloha

Do you believe in magic?

Cirque Hawaii recently debuted in Honolulu – it is sort of a local version of Cirque du Soleil. I use “local” loosely, since most of the performers are from Central Asia and Mongolia. It must be kind of a surreal life to train as a circus performer somewhere in Kyrgyzstan and end up in Waikiki….
The performers were great, especially the acrobats. And, the quick-change artists were amazing. I can’t help but try to figure out the ‘trick’ behind a magic performance, but there was no ‘trick’ behind the performance of the contortionist. The woman folded herself into shapes that I would never have thought possible. Sort of erotic and freaky at the same time…


Ahhh… the great outdoors

Given my borderline relationship with Thumper, I thought that it was appropriate to post this. Perhaps I should write a “how to” guide on getting a rabbit to be your pimp?Â

2) How do I know if a dolphin wants to have sex?A2) There are various ways a dolphin has of showing that she or he is interested in sex.
Males are probably the easiest to detect. They will swim around, sporting an erection (anywhere between 10 to 14 inches long for a Bottle-nose), and will have no bones about swimming up to you and placing their member within reach of your hand. If you are in the water, they may rub it along any part of your body, or wrap it around your wrist or ankle. (Dolphin males have a prehensile penis. They can wrap it around objects, and carry them as such.) Their belly will also be pinkish in colour, which also denotes sexual excitement.
Females can be a little harder. The most obvious way a female dolphin has of displaying her sexual interest is the pink-belly effect. Their genitals become very pink and swollen, making the genital region very prominent. They may be restless, or they may be acting as normal. If you are out of the water, they may swim up to you and roll belly up, exposing themselves to you, coupled with pelvic thrusts. If you are in the water, they may press their genitals up against yours, nibble your fingers, nuzzle your crotch, or do pelvic thrusts against you.
Each dolphins way of expressing sexual readiness varies, so the longer you know the dolphin, the better you will detect when they are sexually active.
Q3) What do I do if a dolphin wants to mate with me?
A3) Accept, if possible! I will go through the steps involved with males and females…
The Male:
When a male dolphin is interested in you, about the only thing you can do, if you are male, is to masturbate him. (Unfortunately, I cannot speak for the female of the human species… it seems women just don’t like dolphins enough… so I cannot say for sure if it is safe to mate with them. I would suspect not, due to a dolphins size, but then again, I cannot say for a woman.) WARNING! In the considerations of safety, you should NEVER let a male dolphin attempt anal sex with you. The Bottle-nose dolphin member is around 12 inches, very muscular, and the thrusting and the force of ejaculation (A male can come as far as 14 feet) would cause serious internal injuries, resulting in peritonitus and possible death. Unless you are the masochistic type, you will have a hard time explaining your predicament to the doctors in the emergency ward….

Politics Uncategorized

Let's build bridges not fences


Citizen Lobbyists Sending Bricks to Congress
Those in favor of building a fence between Mexico and the U.S. are sending bricks to congress as a way to show their representatives what they want. It’s clever (the bricks not the fence) and really gets the message across what these people want. As one congressional aide put it, it’s lucky the bricks aren’t coming through the windows.
As to the idea of a fence itself, what in the world are they thinking? Did a fence keep the Mongols from invading and conquering China? Did it keep East Germans from making daring flights across the Berlin Wall? Do fences keep rabbits out of the carrots? The answer to all of these is no. Fences do not work. Borders do not work. The U.S. is once again following the ill conceived agenda set out by Israel. First was the desire to preemptively strike terrorists (prior to 911, even the U.S. said this was unjust) and now we want to build a huge fence along our borders too.
Here is a newsflash for the good citizens of the United States and Israel. Exclusion and violence don’t work in furthering a democracy. It seems like when I was a child learning about what made America great, it was the idea of the melting pot, the idea of inclusion, and the idea of accepting the tired, poor, and hungry. Especially if they are even more tired, poor, and hungry than we are.
The best thing out of the brick sending? A New Jersey Representative encouraging his colleagues to donate the bricks to Habitat for Humanity. Houses will make a positive difference, fences will not. Now if we can just figure out how to tell our lawmakers how to make bridges.



Garden of Dreams

Garden of Dreams : A garden show piece entitled the 4Head Garden of Dreams by designers Marney Hall and Heather Yarrow is on display on the preview day for the annual flower show, in London. (AFP/Carl De Souza)

in and out

Chinese hanging on giant cocks

I hate to drag the whole tone of this blog down to my level but sometimes a picture is so stirring and veiled in symbolism and contextual importance that good taste must be bypassed. This is art baby. ? B.E

in and out insurance nightmares Oddities shananapocalypse

Is that your other arm or you just glad to see me?

Mr. Chairman, tell me this isn’t a sign of the coming shananapocalypse. The three armed bowser flex… and I hate to be crass, but can you imagine the masterbatory life this lucky little fellow can look forward to. Gives “the stranger” new meaning. Yikes. B.E.Taipei20Times20-20photo

Oddities Uncategorized

A Nice Story…


KEY WEST, Fla. – A man wearing a purple women’s bathing suit and carrying a flare gun was arrested after he told a bartender he was going to “get rid of all the dirt bags in Key West,” authorities said.
Jeffrey C. Anderson, 55, was charged with carrying a concealed firearm Monday after he brandished the flare gun, which was under a skirt he was wearing, Key West police spokeswoman Christie Phillips said.
The bartender, who was not identified, was working in the downstairs bar of The Bull and Whistle, a popular Key West watering hole located on Duval Street.
“She reported she had seen a man, later identified as Anderson, dancing in the street showing tourists his private parts, and asking people for money when they took his picture,” the news release said.
The bartender said Anderson then approached her, telling her he was going to get rid of the city’s “dirt bags” before displaying the gun, police said.
Police quickly located Anderson and found an orange 12-gauge flare gun in his possession, Phillips said. He was transported to the Monroe County detention center. It was not clear if he had a lawyer.

Politics Uncategorized

More Reserve U.S. Troops Deployed To Iraq

Okay, here is my story of the day….

The U.S. military has made the decision to send the rest of an Army National Guard unit from Kuwait into Iraq in the hopes of quelling an upsurge in violence in recent days. The remaining 1000+ soldiers are scheduled to deploy in the volatile Anbar provence and the city of Ramadi where Pennsylvania National Guard units have been struggling to contain volatile emotions and increased attacks. In recent days there has been a spike in all kinds of casualties including several journalists and an important Sunni warlord who had been assisting the new Iraqi government with his support. As is usually the case, there are scant resources available to tell us how many Iraqi civilians, frendly combatants, or enemy combatants have been killed of late.
  It’s interesting to note that statistical studies have shown that in order to create a secure situation in a hostile country it is necessary to have a troop to citizen ratio of between 10 and 20 troops for each citizen. At the present time Iraq has a population of 26 million plus. This means that the U.S and Iraqi government and their allies would need to have a minimum of 2.6 million troops available and on duty in Iraq to completely quell any violence. At present there are slightly more than 120,000 US troops. Consider this, Baghdad itself has close to 6 million people. If you combine Iraqi security forces, police, and US troops you come up with about 30,000 troops. This is a woefully short ratio. Ideally to ensure peace there would need to be 600,000! To quell violence in other regions the US has needed an average of at least 1 to 40. To put those numbers in Baghdad would require a lot more forces. For more on this numbers game go here.
 It’s something to think about. Also consider that statisticians point out that when there is what they call a ‘youth bulge’ a society ends up having some sort of reactionary problem. The last time it happened here was in the 1960’s when the baby boomers hit the magic number of 16-25 years old. When this segment represents more than 20 % of the population this is considered a youth bulge. What it means is that young men and women are left without work, money, meaning, and a large enough infrastructure to support them. Picture a bunch of young guys without jobs on the corners and imagine them deciding what to do. Now consider that Iraq and most of SW Asia have a youth bulge that is between 40 and 65 % of the population. Perhaps instead of nation building, pyramid building would be a more beneficial activity.
  Now, here is the point of all this. Deploying 1000 more troops to Iraq is not going to do a bit of good. Now ask yourself this, is it possible that the US military or government is unfamiliar with what I’ve just described? Now ask yourself this, Why are they doing this? Find the answer to that and you find the answer to a lot more.

The Life Aloha

Sea of remembrance, peace – The Honolulu Advertiser

The Chairman and I attended last night’s Lantern Floating ceremony at Ala Moana Beach Park in Honolulu. It was moving and beautiful to see a thousand paper lanterns honoring the dead floating off onto the waves. Surfers stood out in silhouette against the sky as they herded stray lanterns. We watched one lantern make a break for it and escape from the pack – we’re pretty sure that was our lantern…

With a brilliant sunset as a backdrop, lanterns were set afloat at Ala Moana Beach Park yesterday in memory of the deceased and victims of natural disasters and war.
The eighth annual Lantern Floating Hawai’i ceremony drew thousands of people to Magic Island and Ala Moana Beach Park. There was food and entertainment, but the highlight was the launching of 1,150 lanterns with the names of relatives and friends who have died.
The event was sponsored by Na Lei Aloha Foundation and the Shinnyo-en Hawai’i Buddhist organization. Although the ceremony has Buddhist origins, thousands of people from various religions took part yesterday with a message of hope and healing.

Sea of remembrance, peace – The Honolulu Advertiser

Food and Booze Oddities

Dozens hurt in cheese roll race

Now that’s my kind of sport…

A teenager who knocked himself out while chasing a Double Gloucester cheese down a hill was among 25 people hurt in a Cheese Rolling competition.
Chris Anderson, 18, won one of the five races which make up the annual contest, in which dozens of people race down a 1:2 gradient hill after a large cheese.
St John Ambulance workers at the race, on Coopers Hill in Brockworth, said two people were taken to hospital.
One spectator was given treatment after being hit by a runaway cheese.

BBC NEWS | UK | England | Gloucestershire | Dozens hurt in cheese roll race