Categories
America Anthropology Economics

Ok Boomer Merchandise – Plus Not a Racist t-shirt

This lovely chart shows just how easy the boomers really had it. They love to tell you how much they struggled, but actually, they don’t know shit about struggle.

We’ve created a selection of ‘OK Boomer’ Merchandise for your enjoyment. Our favorite is probably the ‘Suck It Boomer’ hoodie.

There are a few other surprises there too like the ‘I’m not Homeless Yet’ shirt and the “I don’t like to watch people die’ shirt.

Antichrist 2020 Gear on Amazon – Suck it Bezos!


Categories
America assholes

It’s Mind-Boggling How Badly Humanity Has Failed

For a species that has created hundreds (if not thousands) of religions and philosophies which essentially all say “Be kind to each other” or “Take care of each other” it’s mind boggling how badly we humans have failed.

My personal belief is that those of us who would be inclined to work together have fucked up the worst because for some reason we’ve all turned on each other and adopted the psychopathic ‘Winner take all’ mentality as a constant.

Don’t agree with me? That’s fine.

The homeless seniors on the streets don’t agree with me either. Most of them will turn their back on someone worse off than they are – just like the rest of us do. They buy into the philosophy of deserving a better existence than those worse off than them the same as you do and I do. Go ahead, get all self-righteous about it. Bottom line is that as long as someone else is suffering beneath you, you don’t have a leg to stand on. Neither do I.

Imagine a bottom up revolution where taking care of those less fortunate than you was what empowered people.

Start at the very bottom. The mom with one apple and two starving kids looking out of her tent on the side of the freeway and seeing the mom without an apple and two starving kids. She decides ‘Fuck this’ – and gives half her apple to the other parent. Suddenly four have something and two have hope. The bum with half a pizza splits it into sevens instead of filling his belly. And so forth on up the line. The poor, the starving, and the destitute coming together until suddenly – it’s 8 billion to 80. Those last 80 men and women have as much as the other 8 billion people. They live high and mighty, but in my imaginary scenario the 8 billion aren’t playing their game any longer. They aren’t taking scraps to exploit each other any longer. The jig is up.

We’ve all fallen into the trap they set for us. It’s not socialism or communism or redistribution of wealth or any of the other bullshit they’ve fed us. It’s survival of OUR species versus survival of a couple of greedy fucks with clever ideas.

We humans (especially American kind) like to dream though – we like to think that we deserve more than the others. We like to imagine being one of those 80 and that we have the potential to be one of those 80 and we like to create and support systems to protect the wealth we will never actually have. The same systems that cause that homeless mom to cut her apple into three pieces and close the tent door.

Categories
America monkeys nakedness

Proof that the world is sort of f***ed up

Two of the most popular posts I’ve ever written on this site are

http://www.chrisdamitio.com/little-xxx-house-on-the-prairie/ (which details how Finland accidentally gave the DVD release of Little House on the Prairie – one of the most beloved family programs ever made in the USA (based on a beloved set of children’s books) with an adult’s only rating. The google search that finds it is “Little House on the Prairie Porn”

And the other is this: http://www.chrisdamitio.com/running-animal-porn-north-korea-food-and-suicide/ where I griped that I was tired of getting comments with links to animal porn on my site – and google decided that as a result – they would send people looking for ‘animal porn’ to my site…

And, here I am griping about both these posts and no doubt filtering more people who want to see the Ingles Family breeding their livestock, but not in a positive family friendly way. If that isn’t f***ed up, I don’t know what is.

Categories
assholes

I hate having garage sales – a pointless rant

Before anyone tells me not to have a garage sale if I hate having them – let me point out that this is exactly what I’m doing by writing this – reminding myself of – not to have garage sales in the future.

Here’s the thing – I enjoy going to garage sales – but having one of our own is a bummer that I forget about until I’m in the midst of setting it up or dealing with the cheapos and wack jobs that show up for such things. They show up early, they make offers that are insulting (Will you take a nickel for this?) and in general – I’m pretty sure that giving all this stuff to charity for a tax write off is the better option – so let’s hope I remember this the next time I consider having a yard sale or garage sale.

Yes, there are some nice people and yes, we usually end up making a fair amount of money – but the days usually start off bad with people ignoring the signs or free listings on craigslist which say 8 am, no earlybirds – and before we get the chance to set up we have people going into our garage or opening up boxes without so much as a by your leave.

Then there are the old ladies with thier nickel and dimes and even worse the younger ladies or men with their nickels or dimes. Look, I’m a picker – I look for bargains – but I never offer less than a dollar and usually pay the price people are asking. I’ll make offers on high priced things but they are reasonable and respectful offers – and I never argue with someone about what their stuff is worth. I make an offer with a smile and maybe an explanation and then they either take it or not – and usually, we’re both still smiling. The creeps that come to my sales will try to tell me that I don’t know what something is worth and when I tell them that I own an antique shop and do frequent appraissals – they sometimes go so far as to tell me I don’t know my business. This is the point I tell them that they should leave before we have a serious problem.

A guy today tried to tell me he could buy a new gas powered weed eater for $40 at Walmart. I pulled out my phone and showed him that they are actually $138.47 – a woman asked me how much for an old mill saw blade – I told her $10 and she said “I was thinking more of a dollar” – I told her “You can give me your dollar as a donation, but the blade stays here for any less than $10” at which point another lady handed me $10 – little did I know that my wife had just agreed to sell it to her for $15 – but that’s fair game.

The early birds piss me off as a picker, a seller, and as a human being. My ads and signs clearly state 8am, no early birds – and yet people still roll up at 6:30 and sometimes knock on the door to ask if they can look early…these same guys are doing the same things to other sellers and when i show up at the listed time – the good stuff is usually gone – nice guys finish last – what kind of world is this?

Estate sales are a different story – you set a time and lock the door, let the crowd build and work themselves up to a fever pitch then let them in an entry point and have a controlled exit where they can line up and pay for their purchases…no questions, no b.s. – everything is the price it is marked until the last day then it’s half price – of course, my friends that run estate sales tell horror stories about that too…

It’s the cheapohs – crabs at the bottom of the bucket trying to suck all the same shit and clawing each other to do it – next time – I’ll donate it if I can’t sell it on ebay or craigslist…

 

Categories
Books and Writers in and out

Little House on the Prairie

I love this, just because I grew up watching Little House. I even had chickens named after the characters. Of course it wasn’t Little XXX House on the Prairie.

HELSINKI (Reuters) – Finland has rated the DVD release of the much-loved children’s television series “Little House on the Prairie” suitable for adult viewing only.

To save money, Universal Pictures decided not to submit the series to state inspection, the company’s Finland marketing manager Meri Suomela told Reuters on Wednesday.

Finnish authorities charge 2 euros ($2.57) per minute for assessing the correct age limit on films and television series. Distributors who forego this can only sell their shows with a sticker saying “Banned for under-18s.”

“Long series can get quite expensive to check, and some use this exemption in the law to their advantage,” said Matti Paloheimo, Director at the Finnish Board of Film Classification.

“Such unchecked material should not be shown to children publicly,” he added.

Little House on the Prairie, which ran from 1974 to 1983, portrayed life in the U.S. West in the late 1800s and was based on the Laura Ingalls Wilder’s children’s book of the same name.

It remains popular in Finland, and is still shown weekly on Sunday mornings on state-owned broadcaster YLE.

Categories
in and out

Teledictonics

Boing Boing: A Directory of Wonderful Things
Violet Blue’s Teledildonics show-‘n’-tell photoblogged
Boing Boing reader VonGuard sez:

Last night at Dorkbot SF, Violet Blue gave a wonderful presentation on the current state of teledildonics: the science of manipulating sex toys through the Internet. Immediately following the conclusion of her speech, Violet proceeded to manipulate a Thrillhammer in New York’s Museum of Sex. But the attempt was marred by technical difficulties ranging from slow camera updates to not having the cursed thing plugged in. This was perhaps the first time in history that a room-full of people had managed to frustrate a woman 3000 miles away. In the end, however, Net Michelle did manage to get her rocks off as Violet piloted her to orgasm. The thrust of the experiment basically proved that teledildonics has made some major progress, but is also a long way from being a viable form of sexual gratification. I’ve posted my pictures form the event on my site and included a somewhat more detailed account in my blog. Enjoy!

I reckon Miss Violet will blog about the event herself whenever she recovers from all the excitement.

Categories
assholes nakedness Politics

Flashback: Naked Pictures of McCains vice presidential pick. Sarah Palin.

I’m glad there aren’t any of Biden. Actually, I haven’t looked, there might be. These are not confirmed, but it looks like the real deal. From OSI There’s a conservative for you.

Categories
Books and Writers in and out Spirituality and Religion

The Sex Score in a Bizarre World Lab

by
Sex Score and Universal LabHe took his coat off and hung it on the peg,, where it always was, waiting for him to take it wherever he went. He walked into the kitchen, melancholy, and full of wonder as his mind thought back to the days of his youth. Working on yachts and falling in love at every port until the list of loves became like a list of books he’d  read. And forgotten.

It was no longer  simple  to answer  how many women he’d slept with or how many times he’d been in love. He had to second guess himself. In recent years he’d answered with

“ You really don’t really want to know that” and if pressed he would say “Four”. It was the magic number. Not too many, but not too few. Only it was such an outrageous lie.

Bizarre world in which you were expected to keep your own score as you went and nearly every other person was keeping their own “score”. It turned it into a giant competition for the good and the bad.

Life was confusing enough without developing this incredibly complex game called Love. It was a constant battle to remain afloat in the overcrowded sea of humanity.

He set his briefcase down and walked into the living room, grabbing a banana as he passed through the kitchen. He sat in his lazy-boy recliner and reached for the remote control after rocking the lever back as far as it would recline.

Kicking off his shoes he wondered to himself, “ Why are my socks so nice. Why do they have designs woven into them.Certainly not because I like them, but as a part of the game. At some point I decided that nice socks would make it simpler to seduce women.”

He kicked off his shoes one at a time. Right foot first, then left foot. They dropped to the floor  beneath the footrest of the recliner. He knew they would get in the way when he went to un-recline, but at this point he didn’t care. Later he would be annoyed with his earlier self for creating more work for his later self.

Life is like that. The now you is usually making decisions for the later you, and usually,  they are lousy decisions. Maybe you get it right more often as you get older, but you still screw up every time you do anything important.

Hindsight is 20/20, Foresight is often blind.

If we knew the future would we let it happen, or would we change the future, making it unknowable. Knowing too much is worse than knowing nothing most of the time.

What if you knew you’re destiny and hated it? Would you create it by trying to evade it? In which case would you have created it without the knowledge?

Does the universe have clockwork motion which gives us 70 or 80 years before we have to return to our places? What do we want?

Now is the time to communicate with our future selves so that we don’t regret any decisions later, make the best decisions possible.

What should I do? Do what you think is right.  Don’t hold back in your beliefs, explore them, trust them, make the most of your hunches and talents. It isn’t really what you think that counts.

Do you get what I’m saying? It makes sense to live your life as if every decision is your last.

When does it end? We don’t know. I t goes on as long as it goes on so make yourself at peace today. Find what it is you need to do.

What you would regret in your last moments. So what if you thought it would go on, you’d have more time.

You don’t that is the nature oft eternity. The world isn’t the friendliest place in the universe. It is made to solve problems.

Think of the world as a laboratory. The picture you had as a child was not entirely wrong. The Universal  God is a consciousness, which works in a clockwork fashion to an ultimate goal.

Humanity and life are a way to solve certain theoretical problems. Life is placed within the universe in various situations to which the best solution is found through adaptation.

It is not the word of anything. Each planet not a lab, but a test tube contained within the vast workshop-lab that is the universe.

Categories
Anthropology

Native Americans were cannibals

cannibal native americans
Of course, just about all people in the world were cannibals at some point. The Hawaiians did it, the Tahitians did it, the Scottish and Germans did it. I’m guessing that the Native Americans did too…
Here is an interesting tidbit though that the people who lived in the Mississippi region (Mound builders) were actually not the peaceful agrarians that everyone once thought they were…
cannibal native americans

COLLINSVILLE, Ill. _ Human sacrifice! Victims buried alive! Read all about it in “Cahokia _ Ancient America’s Great City on the Mississippi.”
According to this new book by University of Illinois archaeologist and professor of anthropology Tim Pauketat, the mound builders weren’t always the idyllic, corn-growing, pottery-making, fishing-hunting gentle villagers depicted in various dioramas at the Cahokia Mounds State Historic Site in Collinsville.
Pauketat said these long-vanished people practiced human sacrifice of women and men on a mass scale and weren’t always careful to bury only the dead.
Based on years of study of artifacts including many from the extensive excavation of the site’s Mound 72 during 1967-71, Pauketat’s book is getting national attention. The Washington Post described it as “undeniably hot.” A national online review service used the headline, “Sacrificial virgins of the Mississippi.”
The “virgins” angle may be a bit of an overstatement, said Pauketat, but not by much.

Categories
Anthropology

Oddities of Human Nature

oddities of human nature
As I look at the world, sometimes the things we humans do absolutely stun me. A lifetime of study and a degree in anthropology haven’t made things any less shocking. Here are four examples of bizarre human behavior pulled from the news today.
1)A Connecticut woman who authorities say spent more than $2,000 to stage a dinner honoring her as “Nurse of the Year” has been charged with pretending to be a nurse at a doctor’s office. Betty Lichtenstein, 56, of Norwalk was charged Thursday.Prosecutors say Dr. Gerald Weiss believed Lichtenstein was a registered nurse, especially after she was named the Connecticut Nursing Association’s “Nurse of the Year” in 2008.According to the arrest warrant, that association does not exist.
2)Like most restaurants, the Burger King in this St. Louis suburb has a no shoes, no shirt, no service policy. And baby, do they enforce it. Too much so, the company admitted, after apologizing for restaurant workers who asked a mother to leave because her 6-month-old wasn’t wearing shoes.
3)Some of the world’s most serious chocolate shopping takes place in Brussels, Belgium. There are elegant showrooms with specially trained salespeople handling little squares of chocolate with white gloves. Despite the economic downturn, tourists are still bringing home treats for their friends and family.
4)Great Train Robber Ronnie Biggs has been formally released from prison after being granted freedom on compassionate grounds. Biggs is severely ill with pneumonia and Justice Secretary Jack Straw approved his release on Thursday after being told he is unlikely to recover. The odd thing with this story is that Biggs managed to escape, went to Brazil, was living the good life, and then he returned and spent the rest of his life in jail.